When we feel overwhelmed often times it is by our schedule, our to-do list, or the people that are around us. Some of those items cannot be changed, however there are some of those items that you simply think you cannot change.
Overwhelm, this is a word that brings such negativity and weighs you down. Let’s change it for a different word or phrase…
How to feel lighter and in control today.
Doesn’t that feel better??? I want to feel lighter. I want to feel in control of my feelings and my day. Let’s make it happen!
Step 1: Start in the evening.
Each evening as you climb into bed, set your intentions for the next day.
You can do this by adding reminders to your phone for the next day, in a hand written planner, or on a pad of paper, but take the time to do it! Then look at the list and think to yourself “Can I realistically do all of these items tomorrow or is there something I should take off the list?”
Then take that list and put the items in order. I like to notate which things HAVE to be done that day and which items I would hope to get done, but could happen on a different day if I didn’t get to them.
Some of the items on your list can include “read to my child”, “go to the park”, “bake cookies”. This is a list of all of your intentions for the next day and remember to keep it realistic. It you feel overwhelmed by the list tonight, guess how you’re going to wake up?
Step 2: Choose to wake up on the Right side of the bed.
You’ve set your intentions for the day, you know what you want your day to look like, so make it happen!
Whether you wake up to an alarm or to a baby crying, take a few moments to visualize your day. Think through your schedule and the items you have on your list to complete and imagine yourself accomplishing all of those things. Some mornings you might have to do this super speed, or maybe you find that the shower is the best place for you. I personally like to do it while my eyes are still closed before my feet hit the floor.
However you do it, take a few moments to walk through your day and imagine the success you will enjoy that day.
Step 3: Talk Positive
Affirmations – Affirmations – Affirmations!
If you know me you know I’m a huge advocate for positive affirmations. If you wake up in the morning to a child poking you in the eye, a big zit on your face, and the shower water running cold you just might say “Man, this is going to be one of those days!” And guess what?! You said it! It will be “one of those days”.
OR YOU CAN CHANGE IT! Yes, that’s right! Instead of “This is so frustrating!” How about “I’m looking forward to walking my dog today.” Instead of “I can’t do anything right today.” How about “I’ve got today handled.” Instead of “I’m such an idiot.” How about “I am strong, smart and capable.”
You can do this! You are strong, smart, capable, talented, happy. You just have to believe it. If you are unfamiliar with affirmations check out my post on mentally strong affirmations.
Step 4: Stick to Your List
You might have other things thrown your way during a day (a social engagement, a work task, some family drama that begs your attention). It’s okay to say NO!
Are you the “YES MAN!” A great Jim Carrey film where he starts saying yes to everything, until it becomes too much.
I’m not saying don’t be spontaneous, I’m just saying if you are trying to move from a feeling of overwhelm to a feeling of lightness and ease in your life then allow yourself to say no to things that will push you over the edge. Don’t add more to your plate then is necessary and allow yourself to say “I would love to do that, Wednesday would work great for me.”
When I was in the throes of fibromyalgia I struggled with social anxiety so bad that on the day of an event I would feel sick. I came to discover that if I had a social event scheduled for the evening I needed to clear my afternoon, take a nap, and not add any extra items on my list of things to do that day. If you are in that place, give yourself some grace, tell yourself you can do it, and be at peace with where you are.
Step 5: Get Outside
We all know getting outside is good for us but do we realize HOW good?!
I’ve recently discovered why I LOVE walking on the sand and grass in my bare-feet SO much! There is a thing called “grounding“, have you heard of it? It’s actually scientifically backed that due to the earth’s amount of negatively charged electrons we can actually absorb the earth’s electrons. However, this only happens from contact with our skin. So while the sand and grass feel good on our feet, it’s even more than that. This idea of grounding can actually have an intense anti-inflammatory and energizing effect on the body! Can you believe that?! Don’t we all need a little more of that?!
So go breathe in some fresh air, watch the sunset, go for a walk, or take your lunch outside and enjoy some of the benefits of being outdoors!
How do you lessen your load? How do you move things from the urgent to not-so-urgent list? How do you eliminate the overwhelm and replace it with calm, peace and lightness?
]]>Have you used affirmations before? Let’s start there then. What is an affirmation?
Affirmation:
a statement or sign that something is true
the act of saying yes or of showing that you mean yes
emotional support or encouragement
What if you did all of these things for YOURSELF each day?! You don’t have to wait for someone else to tell you that you are BEAUTIFUL today! You don’t have to wait for someone else to tell you that you are BRAVE or POWERFUL, or SMART, or HAPPY! You get to decide that each morning.
But what if instead of just “deciding” that each morning, you took a moment (maybe it’s while you’re showering or brushing your teeth and while your eyes are still closed and you are trying to peel them open) and you told yourself that.
I’ve been doing this for years, my husband jumped on board and we even do this with our daughter (we’ll talk more about kid affirmations in another post – super powerful!). Not only can these affirmation statements change your day, but I believe if you are consistent they can change your outlook and your life.
If you don’t believe me go check out this article on how brain scans are explaining that affirmations work by Christian Jarrett. WILD!
So let’s get to it; how do you know what affirmation statements you should use? How to comb through all the affirmations you can find online? How many should you use at one time?
Here’s how to start: If you are just beginning pick the top 1-3 things you worry about on a daily basis or that you are working towards. Take those and decide on a counter point to each of them.
For example: If you are frustrated about dealing with chronic pain your counter statement might be “I LOVE MY BODY AND ALL IT IS CAPABLE OF!” If you feel like you are “always” forgetting to do things your counter statement might be “I AM IN CONTROL OF MY MIND AND I TAKE CARE OF MY FUTURE SELF.”
This last week I have walked around the house saying “LIFE IS EASY, LIFE IS EASY.” and pretty soon life looks, feels and becomes easier.
So here they are, my top 10 favorite go-to affirmations:
1. I love and appreciate all my body does for me!
2. I am enough!
3. I am strong, beautiful and powerful!
4. I am grateful for all I have and give freely to others!
5. I have an abundant and blessed life!
6. I am in control of my thoughts and my actions!
7. I am happy!
8. I see the best in people and experiences!
9. I love myself and my family just the way we are!
10. Life is easy for me!
What affirmations have you used that you have found to be successful? Share with us!
]]>There is a concept called the “SPOON THEORY”
The idea being that you have a certain amount of “spoons” allotted per day. You have to choose how to use those spoons. If you use more than your allotted amount for that day, the next day you will have less spoons. And playing catch up is often difficult.
When this concept was first explained to me by my doctor, she said I had 6 spoons each day, and something like vacuuming the house would use up 3 spoons leaving me with 3 spoons for the rest of the day. I needed to be wise in how I used my spoons and I needed to plan my days accordingly.
Depending on where you are in your chronic journey your spoon allotment might be different, and the amount of spoons any given activity requires will be different. But the chart above gives you an idea of where to start if you are new to the spoon theory.
Here’s the question: How do you accept this concept and come to terms with slowing down your life?
Most people, myself included, get thrown into the slower paced life whether we want to or not. We are forced by our bodies to come to a screeching halt. However, the mental game of acceptance and joy doesn’t happen all at once and we are left picking up the pieces. So what now?
Giving yourself grace is number 1! You have to be kind to yourself and allow yourself the rest your body needs WITHOUT the GUILT!
The amount of reading or TV time will increase, the number of naps you need will certainly go up, and guess what?! THAT’S OKAY! If no one around you is telling you that’s okay then take it from me, it is more than okay to slow down, in fact it’s like medicine to your body to slow way down.
Letting go of old hobbies and replacing them with new hobbies will carry you from defeat to victory!
Instead of huffing and puffing that you can’t ski anymore, try picking up snow shoeing. Instead of sucking your thumb that you can’t be a triathlete right now, change your focus and become the best yogi in town! And who knows?! You just might love your new hobbies even better. Don’t let a condition get the best of you, you conquer it!
Prevent damaging current relationships by communicating with people close to you.
Sharing information such as the Spoon Theory and talking about your new limitations with help people become supportive instead of critical. I found that when I went to a social gathering, if I had at least one person there who understood my new life, I could be more comfortable and could follow my new ‘rules’ better. People will step up for you and announce that you aren’t going to do an activity instead of getting pressured into it.
Find healthy outlets to release negative emotions you are likely harboring.
When you are transitioning to a new way of life it’s normal to have feelings of loss, disappointment, even depression. You don’t have to go through this transition alone. Find a support group, check in with a close confidant on a regular basis, pick up journaling, or begin attending an exercise class with others who understand your physical limitations. I’ve used all of these at different times in my journey and they have all helped me get to a place of healing.
